Monday, May 31, 2010
A couple of pics of his bench and grave. There's a nice fountain in the background, and you can hear the water. Nate loved the water. We didn't stay long yesterday because Owen was all over the place. We'll go back by ourselves when the marker is ready and take pics of that.
I have a really hard time at his grave. I don't feel comfortable there yet. I know his body is there underground and I want to dig him up and see him again. I know that sounds so weird and creepy. It's easier for me to talk to him in his room or anywhere at the house, because I'm talking to his spirit, to him as an Angel. At his grave, I know his body is there and it's so hard!!!! His body underground, that's just not right!!! But that's how it is with everyone who passes away, so why am I not able to deal with this aspect of it???? At home, his body is not here, it's easier to accept him being an Angel and a spirit. At his grave, he's there! I just can't handle it! But, I have to. I just have to.