Wednesday, May 26, 2010

I'm MAD! But getting over it...

It's me. I haven't been able to post anything in a couple of days because I'm really just sick and tired. Sick and tired of depressing news, stress, sadness, etc. I needed a few days to accept reality (AGAIN!), and get over my initial feelings of random emotions, the most popular emotion being anger. I mean, what in the world? A heart defect, seriously??? It was, needless to say, a crazy weekend. I initially wanted to beat someone up, yell at God, scream at the top of my lungs. It took time for me to process what was going on. I didn't really even know exactly what Owen had until Monday I think. Didn't want to know. Didn't want to hear the three initial diagnosis of one of my son's, AGAIN! Didn't want to know what caused it, NOTHING! All I wanted to know when this all first happened that he was going to be okay. I didn't get that feeling until late Friday afternoon. So, here I am posting about Owen and SVT, not Nate and SMA. And in the midst of major loss and grieving, a curve ball is thrown our way which distracted us for a few days - all focus was on Owen. And still is of course. But the grieving for Nate has reappeared. And now we have grief, which will always be with us, but also a heart problem with Owen. But, I am relieved that SVT can be controlled, and when he's 12 to 14 years old, can be healed of this heart defect.

Owen is doing fine. The heart medication he is on slows his heart rate and has caused him to sleep more and get a little more fatigued easily. But, the dr. said his body will adjust to this new medicine in time. Our main worry was him actually TAKING the medicine. He is a bit picky about medicine. It has been a little bit of a battle, but I think we are making progress and with each dose, he seems to do better. Thank the Lord because we're not talking about tylenol here, we're talking about HEART medication! UGH! And, supposedly if he takes the medicine, he should have no more episodes of SVT.

I've posted a few pics of Owen. One is of him Monday when he had to wear a halter with probes all over his chest to monitor his heart rate for 24 hours. We had to give him a sponge bath that night. Also one of him listening to Trey's heartbeat. Now we are using Nate's pulse ox on Owen (unbelievable!) to check his heart rate throughout the day and also listening to his heart with the stethoscope. So now he likes to take part and listen to everyone else's hearts :) - my darling boy!

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